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Via the Miami New Times:

After six months of doing exactly nothing about a police department in disarray and a looming $40 million budget gap, Miami City Manager Tony Crapp Jr. is packing up his office this afternoon and bailing for a cushy private-sector job in Broward County.

Gee, thanks for all the hard work, Tony. Anyone out there want the toughest managerial job in local city government? 

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Offered without comment, via the AP:

Police say a man was carrying a dead weasel when he burst into a Hoquiam apartment and assaulted a man.

The victim asked, "Why are you carrying a weasel?" Police said the attacker said, "It's not a weasel, it's a martin," then punched him in the nose and fled.

The attacker was apparently looking for his girlfriend and had gone to her former boyfriend's apartment Monday night where the victim was a guest.

KXRO reports he left carcass behind.

Police later found the suspect arguing with his girlfriend at another location and arrested the 33-year-old Hoquiam man after a fight.

He said he had found the martin dead near Hoquiam, but police don't know why he carried it with him.

A martin is a member of the weasel family. [intro]